Blog associated with a free resource of information for families in the Northern Shenandoah Valley including Page, Shenandoah, Warren, Frederick and Clarke Counties in Virginia.
Wednesday, May 8, 2013
A Letter to the Editor (Save the Winchester CDC)
It's advocacy, not Costco!
Have you ever gone to Costco? Have you ever roamed the aisles and stopped to graze the free sample kiosks? Have you ever gone around the store just to come back to the pizza bites again? Sometimes getting a little snack for free and maybe not buying anything at all?
What would you do if the cafeteria at your child's school stop serving your child food? Would you call the school? Would you do whatever it took to make sure your child wasn't hungry? Would you get involved for the sake of your child and other kids in the same predicament?
Advocacy for your child is important! It helps to ensure that the services they may desperately need stay available. A lot of hard work goes into these services... there are a lot of groups that provide the services for free. But please don't fool yourself, it cost money to run them.
It just hurts to see people lining up for the free stuff, but running for the hills when something is needed from them. Ever since I found out that my child has autism, I have bent over backwards to find every possible service and advantage that I can for him. If that meant giving of my time and my sweat... done. It's not much to ask.
Maybe Costco is a bad example... but you can see the euphoric "free stuff" glazing on their eyes. It's disappointing as well as disturbing.
Trying to stay in the grey areas...
These days it's almost impossible to stay unbiased when it comes to autism activism and advocacy. Autism can be potentially linked to sonograms, vaccinations, pesticides, child abuse of the mother as well as a long list of other things. Nothing has been proven yet, either because of political intervention, corporate lobbying or a complete and total lack of research.
Those of you who know me personally know that I can be a very opinionated person and I have a sarcasm streak a mile wide. Sometimes it is all I can do to leave my personal feelings out of it and stay objective for the sake of the cause. I know that running off at the mouth won't solve anything, but sometimes it sure makes me feel a heck of a lot better!
My point is this... my child has autism now. Of course I hope they find the cause, but I feel that there would be too much political or corporate intervention to ever accomplish anything. I am focusing on my child, his current situation and how I can make his life the best it can be. If I become polarizing on these issues, I may alienate someone who might benefit from NSVAR otherwise. And that's the whole reason I started in the first place... to help everyone affected by autism no matter what the personal opinions are. We are all in this together, and nothing drove that point home more solidly than the Essential Pieces group in Winchester and the deep sense of community shared by the members there. They are my extended family and my motivation.
I just have to straddle that double yellow line and keep it in the middle of the road.
Monday, May 6, 2013
Petition to save the Winchester Child Development Center
The Winchester Child Development Center is being closed.
We need to save this precious resource for our children! Please sign the petition!
Sunday, May 5, 2013
Fair weather friends.
I was looking at the NSVAR Twitter account (twitter.com/NSVAR) and saw a post that made me think. It basically said that Autism Awareness Month was over, and ASD stories are now relegated to page 5 as opposed to the front page.
That made me think. Where's the awareness now? Where did everybody go?
Look at it this way. For a lot of people, awareness is a bandwagon. Fun to ride while everyone else is. Worthwhile when it's the flavor of the month. And until the next fashionable cause comes along.
It's fashionable if you don't have autism. If you aren't the parent of a child with autism.
It's reality for us. May 1st got here and my child is still autistic. Where are you now?
Here's another way of looking at it... Thanksgiving rolls around and people start to volunteer at the homeless shelter between then and Christmas. Great food, donations of clothes and money. Because it makes them feel good. It absolves them of their guilt. They don't stop to think that there is another 335 days left until the holiday season rolls around again! Don't get me wrong... the awareness/attention is appreciated! But we don't disappear after the 30 days is up.
People sure act like we do, though. It kinda sucks.
My awareness year started January 1st. It will end December 31st. It's starts over again at midnight on New Years Day.
Saturday, May 4, 2013
A couple questions for you...
1) Find the use of the "R" word even more absolutely disgusting? (you know the one)
2) See even more beauty in a child with disabilities than you ever had before?
3) Find yourself holding your tongue in public when you get dirty/disgusted looks when your child is mid-meltdown?
4) Give other parents a sympathetic smile or nod when they are going through the same thing?
Heres my answers, if you are interested:
1) As for me, I never did like the R word much. I like it even less now. I wont use it, and I will give the dirty eyeball to anyone who uses it around me.
2)In Costco today, my wife and I were in line behind a mother and daughter. The little girl had Downs Syndrome. She was an absolutely beautiful little girl with the sweetest smile! I watched her and relished in her innocent joy. Unabashed happiness.
3) 2 things: A) I'm sasquatch sized... most wont give me a dirty look for obvious reasons. B) I wont hold my tongue. I know maybe I should, but no.
4) Always.
Please answer in the comments... I'd love to know!
Friday, May 3, 2013
Tone it down a little, will ya?
While in the process of looking for articles for the NSVAR social network pages, I inevitably find articles by parents and advocates that take an almost combative stance. I never really can wrap my brain around that.
I completely understand a strong desire to advocate for your child, your family or your friends. I admire that, and I do the same thing. But to go on a full frontal attack is just going to put people in a defensive position. People stop taking you seriously when you start to lose your cool.
When I am advocating for my child and need to make my voice heard, I can guarantee you that I will be the 2000 pound silverback gorilla in the room. I refuse to be ignored. Anyone who knows me will see this soon because I will be advocating to keep the Winchester Child Development Center open. Do you think the Virginia Department of Health would take me seriously if I were to start screaming like a raving lunatic?
Stand tall, say it loud and say it with conviction. Make sure they hear you. Make sure they know who you are. But say it with intelligence, think before you speak and say it with the composure and compassion of a loving friend or family member dead set on achieving your goal. Make them take you seriously.
And if you feel the need to bring a 2000 pound silverback gorilla with you, just tell me where to show up!